Stripping it down

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Make it stand out

WHATEVER IT IS, THE WAY YOU TELL YOUR STORY ONLINE CAN MAKE ALL THE DIFFERENCE.

Consider this: Social media is a form of real-time memoir. 

You are telling your story every day! I have seen people fall in love, get married, get divorced, move to new locations, take on new jobs, move houses, lose family, gain family, fall in love again, have babies (literally, have a baby on camera) ... OMG!! All on Instagram!

Does that blow your mind? And for myself, I realize that I've been a mini-memoirist (is that a word? If not it is now!) for decades.

Consider this: As a former journalist, I feel as if every article I’ve ever written was a mini memoir.

I visited different people, asked them pointed questions about the most intense times in their business and life and wrote it up as close to their truth as possible ... creating mini memoirs of a particular time in that person's life.

The only difference between doing that and helping people write their memoirs today is that now the process is more collaborative. But the feeling is the same – that I am telling a story that matters because there is always a degree to which our stories are universal. And big or small, there is something we can learn from everyone.

Sometimes I hear people's stories and suggest they write a memoir which often freaks them out a little and responses range from "But I'm not famous" to "I still have more life to live!" At that point I tell them that you don't have to be  famous to write a memoir, and writing a memoir doesn’t mean you are dead. That would be an autobiography. Memoirs are a personal, curated collection of thoughts and personal “facts."

Here are 5 QUESTIONS I pose to people when they are getting serious about writing a memoir. 

1. What story do you want to tell?

   I don't believe that memoirs have to be something from long ago in your life. There really are no rules of when the story you want to tell takes place. Memoirs are often centered around an event (good or bad) that deeply affected the writer. A collection of curated memories, the story usually includes lessons learned, actions taken and deeper insights.

2. What is the journey your character (you) will go through?

   Are you ready to relive those? If you are sobbing upon writing an outline, perhaps a little distance is needed first. (But, that said, yes, there will be some crying).

3. What is the outcome you desire?

   How do you want to feel when you are done? How do you want the reader to feel when they finish reading?

4. Are there other elements you want to include?

   Photos, recipes, illustrations?

   Will that be easy for you to find or create? What will they add to the overall experience?

5. How comfortable are you writing about family and friends who might read your story?

EXCITING NEWS: I will start a memoir writing workshop later this year.

Leading up to it, if you have an inkling you want to write a memoir, or two, I have a FREE mini course (in PDF for now) to help you jumpstart the process.

5 EXERCISES TO HELP YOU JUMPSTART YOUR MEMOIR WRITING (a free mini course)

And to get you thinking about it even more: A MEMOIR READING LIST

• Wild: Lost and Found on the Pacific Northwest trail
  Cheryl Strayed
  Wild is the OG of contemporary memoir story telling. Strayed wrote a pull-me-up-by-my-hiking-boot-straps kinda story. It's all there along the 1,100-mile solo hike that broke down a young woman reeling from catastrophe and built her back up again.

• Becoming
  Michelle Obama
  Who doesn't want to know what life was like in the most famous address in America? Although I also loved learning about life growing up on the South Side of Chicago and how she "became" the person we see today. In fact, I love the structure of the book in three acts. Becoming Me. Becoming Us. Becoming More.

• The Tender Bar
  J.R. Moehringer
  In addition to being a ghostwriter for Prince Harry on "Spare," Moehringer was also the ghostwriter on  "Shoe Dog" by Phil Knight and "Open" by Andre Agassi. But the memoir I recommend from him is his own coming of age story, "The Tender Bar." The story of a young man finding his father, and himself is beautifully written (and was turned into a lovely movie directed by George Clooney).
  
  Two near and dear to me…friends who put their stories out there. I was honored to be part of the writing, publishing and marketing process on both and highly recommend them. Goes to show, you don't have to be a prince or a former first lady to have a compelling story!

• My Culinary Love Story
  Pauline Parry
  This is Pauline's discovery of her love for entertaining, and her love for her soon-to-be husband -- both cooking, and her relationship with Dennis brought her to America to open one of the nation's premier catering and event firms, Good Gracious Events.

• Another Hill and Sometimes a Mountain
  Tim Green
  A powerful testimony to resilience and survival within the foster care system. Tim rises above his humble beginnings. Despite heart-wrenching and dark secrets around the circumstances of his birth family, he comes to forgive people who the rest of us might find unforgivable.